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The Green Keynote

The Green Keynote

Absinthe A touch of lime Half a can of Sprite Mint to garnish The hair of the dog Hard alcohol ban? Well, technically the Green is property of the town… Read more »

The Review Reviews: Candela

The Review Reviews: Candela

The gang once again continues their quest to conquer the culinary establishments of New Hampshire’s Upper Valley, this time embarking on a long-awaited quest to Candela Tapas Lounge, an upscale… Read more »

The D.R.A.

The D.R.A.

One last swig of Irish whisky Collin Michaels lay prone in the snow, his panting breath melting the glistening crystals before him. The trees around him spun before his eyes,… Read more »

Cocktails with the Twisted Sisters

Cocktails with the Twisted Sisters

Not to be dramatic, but the Hard Alcohol Ban is the worst thing that has ever happened to us. Aside from the paternalistic and rights violating sentiment of the policy,… Read more »

The Review Reviews: Base Camp

The Review Reviews: Base Camp

At 6:17pm, Pip Epiffany, Oral Stanfield, and Sheriff Rick Grimes greet Ignatius J. Reilly, who has arrived, characteristically, 17 minutes after the agreed-upon time. This evening the gang dines at… Read more »

Johns Hopkins University Student Government Bans Chick-fil-A

Johns Hopkins University Student Government Bans Chick-fil-A

The Student Government Association at Johns Hopkins University has banned any current or future Chick-fil-A development by a 18-8 vote. The reason — surprise, surprise — is that the delicious culinary institution… Read more »

Seventh-Hole Slurp

Seventh-Hole Slurp

1oz 40 proof whiskey 1tsp maple syrup 1tbs bacon fat When I was a freshman at Dartmouth, back in the fall of 1965, we were still digging up barrels of… Read more »

DDS: Open Minds, Upset Stomachs

DDS: Open Minds, Upset Stomachs

After a long Saturday afternoon of mimosas and NCAA basketball, Paul Allen, Luis Carruthers, and Timothy Bryce lurch into the Hopkins Center’s very own Courtyard Café. The line is unusually… Read more »

Dartmouth Students Not Ready for Hillary

Dartmouth Students Not Ready for Hillary

The Daily Mail interviewed 50 randomly selected Dartmouth students about Hillary Clinton’s recently launched campaign for President. It seems that Clinton has some work to do, to say the least. Only… Read more »

Hanlon “Derecognizes” Younger Self

Hanlon “Derecognizes” Younger Self

For the first time since 1799, Dartmouth President Philip Hanlon ’77 did not recognize an image of himself as a young man. “Jeez, get a load of this kid,” said… Read more »